Because I’m…

Happy!  So here’s some diegetic sound.

I’ve been pretty down lately (probably explains why I haven’t updated in a while), which affected my psyche to the point that I couldn’t bring myself to do the things I loved.  I was afraid to write, thinking that it would be too much of a punching bag (despite the fact that I have a whole category for that)…as in, I didn’t want to sound like a whiney little nobody.  I lost my mojo when it came to dance, so I decided I had to take a break.

College decisions are almost all here, and I’ve gotten more rejections than admissions as expected.  But that’s not really the key thing that’s bothering me, considering how I was anticipating such results in the first place.  Of course, I felt a little upset when I got rejected, but it’s transient.  Nonetheless, I felt my confidence dwindling.  I found myself getting more pessimistic, thinking that I wasn’t prepared for life.  It was just stress.  Moving on.

Of the schools I applied to, I really wanted to get into Columbia, Princeton OR Barnard.  These are really competitive schools, so I am definitely not expecting to get into all of them.  Then again, since nothing ventured, nothing gained, I still applied…so it’d be nice if I could get into ONE of them!  It’s not the reason why I was totally down either, but that’s just…some context.

So I received a piece of good news this morning: an email saying that I got into Barnard!  I wasn’t really expecting it because (a) it’s a competitive school that I really wanted, so of course they’d be highly highly highly selective; (b) I liked the school regardless of the competition and the fact that it’s a women’s college, more details disclosed in an earlier post; and (c) an earlier email had said that the decisions would be announced tomorrow, so getting it a day earlier was pretty surprising.

Anyway, it’s now a huge load off my back, and I’m just happy happy happy.  Of course, happiness is not something that lasts forever, preaches Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, but it’s still something that I can feel today, and remember in the future.

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9 thoughts on “Because I’m…

    1. Haha I do get a little…self-conscious. Oh well…

      And thanks!!! So excited! Do your best for your conditionals, too! You definitely got it for C and E! ;)

        1. I’m younger than you though…I really value the experience more than anything I guess. Maybe that’s why there’s a little less pressure for me?

          Don’t worry too much, you’ll be fine!

        2. You’re not that much younger… I guess I have pressure because my parents will only support me for one university degree and then I’m more or less on my own. I value the experience, but I need to be able to do something with it, too.

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